Coming up for air…
…before diving back into words with a wild abandon.
The Challenge is going well. Every day I sit down at my desk and write, pounding out words to meet the day’s quota. Critique, revision, ripping apart and putting back together again will come later (and probably within the bounds of its own ‘challenge’–is it possible to re-write an entire book in six weeks??) but for now it’s all about the joy of flying fingers. It’s a glad thing, and for some crazy reason I know it’s my obedience right now. That’s all I do know. Not where it will end; not where it will go (if anywhere). None of that matters.
The only thing that matters is, as T.S. Eliot would say, the trying. The pushing through all the resistance of fear and the stopping of the ears to the naysayers in my own head and the creating for the love of the Creator.
That and the gorgeous, gracious thought that so many of you are praying for me. I really and truly cherish the words you have sent my way and your prayers are deeply appreciated. Thank you. It means the world to me.
(And to my little book.)
And before I go under again, I wanted to share this much-loved poem. It perfectly captures for me the angst and the glory of writing (or any creative act) and I often go back and read it again when I’m mired in my own ‘verbal imprecision’. And it always makes me cry:
Blessings on your writing, Lanier! I look forward to the joy and pleasure of reading your book one day! 🙂
Thank you, Lara. You’re a dear to believe in me. 🙂
I am very eager to get to read your book! I so immensely enjoy your blog posts that I know your book is going to be lovely!
We never do know, when we obey the callings of our Lord,
what the outcome will be. The lives changed beyond our
own lifetime, because of our obedience.
I am so thrilled that you have listened…..and obeyed.
May He be present.
May He articulate for you the swirling thoughts onto paper.
I am praying for you, Lanier!
Dear Lanier,
I am very jealous of you! There is something so satisfyingly invigorating about pouring out all you have to something you feel passionate about. I long to do that with my writing. To see what happens if I give it my all–shut out everything else and commit to it alone…just for a time. I’ve actually asked for Jeremiah for that very thing for Christmas for the past three years–A long weekend all by myself somewhere, just to write. However, his free time has been so rare for the past 5 and a half years, that when it comes down to it, and he offers for me to go, I can’t bear to leave him behind.
I haven’t read the writing poem yet. I got chills reading your thoughts on it. And sometimes, I like to hold those types of things at arm’s length for a time. To know there is something rich out there waiting for me. I feel that way about the Olympic Peninsula 😉 I can see her mountains peeking around the corner, calling me now. In my heart, that land has become the last great wilderness (even though my mind keeps telling me this is false). I see it on my runs and sitting at my desk and I long to go…but want to hold it there, unmarred in my mind. Keep it as the perfect mystery it is.
But then there’s another part of me that thinks if I could just have a cabin there for three of four days, all by myself, I could finish this little book I keep pecking away at. I could have it all out in a writer’s ecstasy…But then, I hate the thought of finally obtaining that mysterious land without Jeremiah. You see my circle. My love and avoidance…perhaps my excuse. Perhaps I don’t want to find that my writing, like that peninsula may turn out to be less than I expect.
All that very long comment to say, I am jealous of your time and proud of your commitment to face the thing and find its worth. Praying for you friend!
Sweet Abby–that’s just the thing: Time. There is never time for it. Even now, even in the midst of this challenge, a thousand sirens can be screaming at once for my attention. (And I can only imagine what it would be like if I was the mother of young children, like your dear self.) But if this challenge is about anything it’s about intentionally making time for it in the midst of a busy life (which is fodder in itself, you know ;)), even if it’s only half an hour at a time. All these bits and bots, a hundred words here, a thousand there, all steadily begin to add up–rather quickly, actually, under such intensity as this. 😉
I love your image of ‘the last great wilderness’. And the coolest thing about it is that once you obtain it, there is always another lurking just out of reach further on. “Further up and further in…” And they are all beckoning us onwards towards the same Place.
Keep pecking away, my friend, in faith that all these words are of such worth in a plan you can only see the underside of in this particular instant. You are such an amazingly gifted writer and you have such a beautiful soul. I cannot wait to see what comes of it all. Love you…
I love that you set me right on the notion that your are in some beautiful cloister, only writing, for weeks at a time…when you have a FARM to run, a home to care for, a husband to nurture…Of course you aren’t only writing! I have my hour and a half right now, that I’m begrudging for being so short. That little span that I’m feeling like is too small to even make a start. How about I just START instead of hoping I’ll sometime have hours on end?
Farther up and farther in!
If your writing is even only 10% as good as the way you write your blog, then it will be wonderful, because I absolutely love to read your blog. I have been an avid reader for about 45 years (I started young!) but I have never read anything like this, and you have totally changed the type of books I read. I am LOVING Anne of Green Gables, and I have also bought another two L Montgomery books.
I had almost given up reading, because a lot of modern stuff is depressing, and I kept giving up reading books halfway through, but not any more! I have a little notebook where I have written all your book recommendations, and I keep it with me all the time.
Thank you so much for opening so many new windows for me to fly through xxx
Jayne, what a lovely cup of grace at the end of a long day. Thank you for your words…they give so much encouragement to the words I’ve been pounding out all afternoon.
And oh, how GLAD I am that you have found such literary friends here at my site. That makes me happier than I can say.
Grace and peace–
~Lanier
Thinking of you today .When I have Fears that I may Cease to Be-Keats
When I have fears that I may cease to be
Before my pen has glean’d my teeming brain,
Before high-piled books, in charactery,
Hold like rich garners the full ripen’d grain…
Lord bless that pen of yours.
Bless you, Jodi. xx